Hollow Bastion, First Visit:
In Which A Sword is Lost
The strangest part was that the room had an unusual scent -- like leather and oil and clean linen. Aerith had stripped the beds and aired out the room, but it still lingered, clung to furniture and belongings alike. Roxas lay awake for a good portion of the night, imagining. Cid and Leon shared this room, she had said; but since Leon wouldn't want to wake anyone when he got back and Cid was in a mood to stay up all night playing with his toys, they would be relegated to the first floor to make room for their guests.
Probably, on an ordinary day, they would wake up, and straighten their beds, and get dressed. They'd brush their teeth and comb their hair and head downstairs for breakfast...
This scent is -- human, Roxas thought, staring up at the ceiling.
When he finally got to sleep, he slept deep and long.
Axel was already up when he finally stirred, just like the previous day. "Hey," he said. "Can't believe you didn't wake up when that Yuffie character busted in here earlier."
"She did?" Roxas murmured, rubbing his scalp. He had no recollection of it, and he -- hated that, actually. He definitely missed his lighter, more secure sleep.
"Yeah, she flung open the door and started shouting before she saw you still unconscious and backpedaled."
Okay, he might be sleeping more soundly, but that had to be an exaggeration. "Stop lying and tell me what time it is," he said sourly. Maybe when I'm more well-rested I'll stop sleeping so heavily.
"Not late," Axel said, sitting up. "After nine, before ten. That sort of area."
Roxas relaxed a little. Some part of him had feared that he'd become incapable of waking up before sunset. He pushed himself out of the bed. "Then you should've told her to go back to sleep."
In a matter of minutes they were trooping downstairs, through the open living room (quietly, as Cid was snoring on top of the covers, fully-dressed) and back into the kitchen. It was already occupied by Aerith and Yuffie, sitting quietly at the table with solemn expressions and each of them clutching a cup of coffee like a lifeline. At their entrance, both dark heads turned up, and Aerith smiled at them.
"Morning," she said. She looked tired.
Yuffie didn't seem much better, but she leapt up nimbly and grinned at Roxas. "Hope I didn't wake you earlier," she said cheerily. "I wanted to ask you something and kind of forgot anyone sane would still be asleep."
"What did you want to ask me?" Roxas said, glancing uncertainly at the frying pan on the stove.
"Nothing much," Yuffie mumbled, in the same breath that Aerith prompted, "You're welcome to what's left of that, if you'd like."
Axel leaned over Roxas's shoulder, also peering at it with suspicion. "You didn't make it, did you?"
Yuffie snickered and said, "No, we don't let Aerith cook," making the older girl sigh regretfully. "Cid made it before he passed out."
Although Cid's culinary cooking skills were still an unknown quantity, the fact that it wasn't Aerith was encouraging. Roxas moved over to pick up a plate and noted absently, "I thought you guys said Leon was the cook around here."
"He -- is," Yuffie said, looking at Aerith.
The older girl explained calmly, "I think we mentioned Leon went out to the bailey near the castle last night. He hasn't returned yet."
Axel muttered, low enough that only Roxas could hear, "Sounds like T-R-O-U-B-L-E. Pretend you didn't ask."
Roxas's lips quirked up, and he headed back to the table to sit down, asking, "Does the market here sell weapons, by any chance?"
Then he was the center of everyone's curious attention. Yuffie said, "Yeah, sure. Louie's shop, in the north corner. But -- I'm not exactly an expert or anything, but isn't a keyblade a weapon?"
"A sometimes inconvenient one," Roxas added. "Nearly everyone who sees it knows what it is. I'm thinking about getting a sword or two to use when I don't want people to send me on their errands."
Yuffie grinned, picking up the meaning quickly and thankfully not misinterpreting it. "You mean, you don't wanna be asked to save fair maidens and small puppies everywhere you go?"
Axel said into his coffee, "If only we were that lucky. So far all we've rescued was a nice dinner set, and it wasn't even all that grateful." Roxas elbowed him.
When they had all finished with their breakfast, Yuffie volunteered to escort him to the market, and for some reason Roxas didn't feel like turning her down. After some silent contemplation, Axel elected to stay behind, but requested lazily that Roxas bring him a souvenir.
Since he might only be a liability in a fight, it was probably for the best, and they both knew it.
As Roxas had previously observed, there were three identical ducklings in the marketplace, each running their own stand. The one in the green cap was the weapon seller, Louie, and he watched curiously from the counter as Roxas sifted through his collection.
"Can you even use a sword?" Yuffie asked idly, leaning over the edge of the stand and kicking her legs.
Roxas gave her a flat stare. "...somehow I don't think the lack of teeth will change my fighting style all that much."
"Hey," she protested, hands up, but still cheerful, "whatever you say. I wouldn't know. I use throwing weapons mostly, and the shape makes a big difference on how something flies, but Leon's the swordsman, and for all I know..." The hitch was barely noticeable. "Well, for all I know, he'd agree with you."
He observed the fancy enameling on one sword and passed it over. "Seems like there's a lot of people in that little house," he observed. "Although I guess it isn't so little--"
"--when you see it on the inside, right." The older girl smirked at him a bit. "There's five -- sometimes six of us! But I can't complain, I can't cook at all. I'd starve if Leon wasn't there."
A little bemused, Roxas told her, "Cooking isn't that hard. I did it all the time in Twilight--" But of course, he hadn't really. He only had the memory of doing it. Damnit. With a hopefully barely-noticeable hit of his own, he resumed, "--Town. It's just following directions. Only lazy people can't do it." He lifted his eyebrows at her accusingly.
Yuffie scowled at him. "Well, I'm busy!"
"You're lazy," Roxas corrected.
Apparently she couldn't argue with that any further, because she glanced around restlessly and said with sudden avidness, "Ooh, Huey's got a crate of new accessories. Hang on, I need to see if they have any earrings." She dashed over to another stand.
Roxas smiled to himself, just a little, as he turned back to the weapons. He picked up a blade and hefted it, then took an experimental swing.
Too light. He was used to the weight of two solid blades; the ease of movement would overbalance him. He set it down, picked up a different blade, and nodded a little at the more familiar weight. Now, if the duck had two of these, he could really tell--
The back of his neck prickled suddenly, the hair standing on end a beat before the looming shadow fell over him. Roxas shifted his grip on the sword and spun around to see a figure clad in the Organization's black leather coat, and the sword in his hand shifted to Oathkeeper swiftly, with only a shink sound and Louie's startled squawk to mark its passing.
Too late, Roxas recognized him -- that bearing, that frame, different than the others -- and said, "Riku?"
"What happened to the sword?" demanded the duckling.
"Ah, look, I'm sorry. I'll-- pay for it in a minute," Roxas excused, realizing the fate of any sword he attempted to own. The keyblade didn't return things when it replaced them. It just ate them.
But before he let down his guard any further...
He took a step away from the stand, watching Riku warily.
Which the older boy seemed to notice, judging by the way he lifted his hands, palms up and open and obviously empty. "I know what you must be thinking," Riku said in someone else's voice, "but I'm not here to fight you." He licked his lips, just visible beneath the shadow of the hood, and admitted, dully rueful: "Not anymore, anyway."
"Oh, is that right?" Roxas asked, not quite as coolly as he'd intended. His good mood was gone so thoroughly that he almost couldn't remember what it felt like, and now he was just -- distant, watching as if from a distance, and inexplicably still inside.
"Well, there's not really any point, is there." Although Roxas couldn't see his eyes, he had the distinct feeling that Riku had pointed them elsewhere. "Everyone's been -- pretty clear about that. What's done..." His voice choked off, and he shook his head sharply. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come here. I shouldn't have done -- a lot of things, I guess." His lips twisted. "Would you believe I was trying to help you?"
Roxas set his jaw, thinking, Me, or Sora? not for the first time. Probably not for the last, either. "I wish people would stop deciding what's best for me without my consent," he said.
The words had hurt him, Roxas could tell, but he had barely flinched. "I just... wanted to see him again." It sounded more like a confession than an excuse.
An uncomfortable silence settled as they both thought it: That'll probably never happen, now. Roxas wanted to feel triumphant, but he was struggling with something much wilder in his chest, and he didn't know what it was. Thick and powerful, grief, or guilt, and not his, it was Sora, lingering emotions from someone else's heart.
"I don't intend to die for anyone," he muttered, "but -- I'm sorry about -- your friend."
Riku didn't say anything for a moment, but his shoulders slumped. "Thank you. I guess... This is where I say I'm sorry, too." He laughed, shortly. Painfully. "But I don't know that I'd accept it, if I were you. I can't believe you aren't -- angry at me."
Of course I'm angry. Roxas bit down on his cheek. Or he knew that he was supposed to be angry, had been angry -- the anger came so easily, when he thought of DiZ, but Riku was different somehow. He hadn't known what he was doing, what a bastard DiZ was, and what was more, part of him... understood.
"He'd have done anything to see you again," he said instead, glancing away awkwardly. Still avoiding the name. "So I don't see why I should begrudge you the same thing."
The hooded head jerked up, as if startled, and then after a beat he turned to face Roxas sharply, forgetting for once to hide his yellow eyes. His voice was shaky when he murmured, "Do you know how much you look like him? Sound like him?"
It was a deeply unsettling thing to say, on any number of levels -- I don't want to be like him! -- and Roxas barely managed to keep himself from snarling, "But I'm not him."
"I know," Riku said softly. "That's what makes it so hard."
But still, somehow, he managed to put one foot in front of the other, striding to the other end of the market. He seemed so -- sad, and lonely, walking away with his shoulders taut and defeated, and Roxas watched him with that unbearable something teeming so close to the surface. He shouldn't be-- No. Should was an opinion. An irrational judgment. He doesn't have to be alone.
"Wait! Riku--" Roxas started, and then caught himself. Why hadn't he just let him leave? Look, he's stopped walking. Damnit. At least he hadn't turned around. "...Go home."
Riku's back straightened sharply. "Like this?" he demanded, rough.
But it's still you, it's still Riku, Roxas thought, and was almost drawn up short by the implications of that idea. He forced out in a rush, "It won't matter to Kairi what you look like! The -- the heart's the same, right?"
A simple question, rhetorical, that rang in his ears ponderously. If the heart is what defines who we are, what does that mean for Nobodies? For Axel, and Namine, and the others?
Were they...
"Or whatever makes us human," Riku whispered.
Suddenly Roxas felt his eyes burning, a strange and intense situation -- they itched, so fiercely, and he reached up a hand to press fingers against his eyelids. Gah, what was that for...
"You two should be together," he said stubbornly. It would make him happy, he didn't add.
"You're making it really hard to walk away from you. Why are you doing that?"
Roxas glanced up, startled. "...I'm not doing it on purpose." But now that Riku had mentioned it -- maybe he was doing it on purpose (or maybe part of him was doing it on purpose) and he just hadn't noticed.
It isn't me, he told himself. It's this heart-- this stupid, second-hand heart. It was making him do things, feel things, that he had never needed to bother with before.
"I just," Roxas said, looking down at the cobblestones, "think that you could help each other move on. You and Kairi."
And it would make him feel so much better, all this tightness go away, if he could just think of them together, safe and warm in the Destiny Islands...
But Riku broke that pleasant illusion, saying curtly, "I can't go home. Not yet. I don't know how he can even ask me to go home without--" A pause, and then Riku said, quieter, "Maybe someday. But if you need help -- and it's all right with you -- then I'll be there."
It was still painful, and awkward, but Roxas managed a small smile. "If it's that important to you. But... just until you're ready to go home."
He was half-expecting Riku to thank him, but instead the hooded figure just lifted its head. There was a few beats of silence before Riku murmured, "Good luck. Somehow... I think you'll need it." Then he turned and tossed something over his shoulder; startled, Roxas recoiled to catch it, and when he looked up, Riku with gone.
Alone again, Roxas straightened, every muscle movement feeling achingly slow. He glanced belatedly at the object Riku had tossed at him and nearly dropped it.
This is -- Olette's wallet. Roxas turned it in his fingers, memories of things that had never happened so powerfully real. It felt exactly the way he remembered. Inside it would be five thousand munny...
"Excuse me?" said Louie, hands on his -- hips, probably. "My sword?"
"Sorry," Roxas said, turning around and fumbling for his wallet. He could use the munny in Olette's wallet, but it just didn't feel right to use their hard-earned winnings for himself. That wasn't fair... To people who weren't real?
It wasn't fair to their memories.
"How much did you say it was...?" he asked, with a small, rueful smile. He'd just pay for it himself and get it over with.
NEXT >>> Hollow Bastion, First Visit (Part 3)