Beast's Castle, First Visit:
In Which Some Questions Are Answered
Some things, Nobodies just didn't do as well as the average human being. Sleeping was one of them. Axel caught a little here and there, minutes or hours scattered throughout the night.
Roxas slept straight through, occasionally stirring just enough to roll over or make a noise like a muffled snort before sinking back into sleep.
It was sort of hypnotic to watch.
"Morning," he said, when the stirring finally resolved into a long stretch.
The smaller boy was sitting up, looking around blearily, but at that he startled, turned to give Axel a curious glance. "It isn't really, is it?"
"Pretty much." There weren't any windows in the room with them, but he had a good enough sense of time to place it roughly, and if they'd arrived in the middle of the night... Well, it had to be morning by now.
"Oh." Roxas frowned, and shook his head slowly. His hand did an odd little twitch, reaching for -- his lap, or a pocket or something -- but then the blond seemed to change his mind and rubbed the back of his neck instead.
Gazing at him, Axel decided he was unnerved by the idea of so much sleep, too. "Hey," he said, "you had a big day." A big fucking year. "Bound to be a little T-I-R-I-N-G, if you know what I mean."
"Tiring," the smaller boy repeated, flat and soft. "Yeah. That's one word for it." He raked a hand through his hair, and then seemed to push the thoughts away, swiveling to drop his legs off the couch and stand. "Well, I'm up now, either way. Let's take a look around."
Sure. And why not go for a leisurely stroll, while we're at it? But Axel tried to keep his tone nicely casual. "It might be better to keep moving..."
"Are you really that worried about Riku finding us?"
"Something like that."
Now Roxas was staring at him a little. "I'm hungry," he said at length. "If we're going to be on the run, let's at least do it on a full stomach. Another hour's not going to kill us, right?" There was a definite challenge in his eyes. Go on, argue with me.
Unfortunately for him, he wasn't wrong. Even Nobodies needed to eat, and one hour more or less wasn't going to make the difference. By now, the old men would know that something had gone wrong. They'd know he hadn't done his job. But Xemnas moved slowly. He would want to figure out exactly what had happened before he committed any actual resources to tracking down a pair of fugitives. Maybe they would even waste a little more time looking around for Sora. Either way, it would be at least another day, maybe more, before they really had to start worrying.
And then--
Well, then it was all over for him. He'd be broken down. The little witch, too, if they could find her. And Roxas...
But no, another hour wouldn't change any of that, and Axel said as much.
"Good." The smaller boy was still watching him uncertainly, but after a beat he moved for the door. "Breakfast, and then we get out of here. At least there's a plan," he added in a murmur.
Not really buying it, obviously, but content enough to let the subject drop for the moment. Axel appreciated that.
He hadn't been ready for it last night, and he wasn't ready for it now. Hell, he might never be ready for it, really. How did you tell someone, By the way, I think the only family you've ever had wants you dead?
Out in the hall, nothing had really changed; if anything, Axel thought it was actually a little darker now that day had come, with the windows boarded up so tightly and all the candles half-melted, so many wicks lost now in wax.
Where was everyone? The presence of the monster had kind of chased it out of his head, but the sight of the candles was a nasty little reminder. He just couldn't picture that thing stretching up on its tiptoes to delicately light every last candle on a crystal chandelier. It didn't make any sense. But the alternative was -- what? That some rich guy lived here with a ton of servants and just... let a beast roam his halls at night?
"I'm still not arguing with you on the timing," Axel started, and instantly had to lower his voice because of the way everything echoed in the enormous hall, "but are you sure you wanna grab a bite here? What if it keeps the only fresh food in its nest, or something?"
"Then we'll ask nicely," Roxas said, shooting him an amused glance. "Come on, chicken. There's no way the Beast polishes his own silver. The kitchen must be around here somewhere."
He had to purse his lips to keep from smiling. "Chicken, huh?"
"Chicken."
Well, he couldn't let that stand, now could he? Axel followed the smaller boy up the grand staircase without further complaint, his eyes drifting idly over various sundry embellishments and fixing on a pair of stone gargoyles further up the left-hand staircase. They were sort of -- funny-looking, these ones. Didn't quite match the rest of the decor. It shouldn't have mattered, but for some reason the discrepancy caught his eye...
His attention was still on them when a creak from somewhere above him announced that Roxas had moved to the enormous double doors on the landing and was now attempting to shove them open. Axel felt his mouth quirking, and covered the small distance between them to help. It looked kind of like a two-person job.
The ballroom (because it couldn't have been anything else) was so extravagant that it made the rest of the castle look dark, dirty, and faded by comparison. Shades of gold and rich deep wood were nice, or at least expensive-looking -- the polished floor so finely polished that he could see his own reflection in glossy detail. On the opposite side of the room were the first unboarded windows they'd seen, and Axel thought he could guess why; these ones looked out on a sprawling, overgrown garden, and in the distance... walls.
That last part being the most important.
Around them the air rippled and he felt a wave of heat, sickly in a way that was impossible to describe, settling on his skin like humidity.
Roxas said tensely, "We've got company," and he was right.
Heartless.
It was funny. As a Nobody you couldn't count on much, but you could count on this: Heartless didn't attack you anymore. You didn't have anything they wanted, not anymore. Axel hadn't seen them appear this way, the sudden swarm, yellow eyes bright with hunger, for years.
Not like he didn't know why they were so interested now. He pulled a chakram into each hand, cast a glance back at the other boy, and had to say it. "You do remember how to fight, right?"
The white keyblade was already in one hand, but Roxas shot him a sardonic look and summoned the black one into his other hand. "I was beating you, right?"
"Ah," Axel responded, and even as the words came out of his mouth he knew they might sting, might hurt them both. "That was before you got Sora back in you, though, wasn't it? You fought better than he did." Why was he such a masochist sometimes.
He would have felt the stiffening in the air if he hadn't seen it, but Roxas hardly missed a beat. "Then these guys will be child's play."
Maybe he should have apologized for saying it; maybe he should have laughed or agreed. But there were Heartless everywhere now, surrounding them, and there wasn't time for more than a wry, self-deprecating smirk -- because in spite of their numbers, he really couldn't have agreed more.
Of course, it helped that their enemies were mostly the smaller Heartless -- soldier-shaped ones, the tiny bits with the antennae that lurked behind their big brothers in Never Was, and those airborne flitty creatures with the hook where their feet should have been -- and nothing with any resistance to his flame. The little bastards could come at them in waves.
If it hadn't been the first fight he'd had with Roxas in ages, he might have been actively bored, but the blond's sleek movements and clean strikes were always a pleasure to watch. He was so incredibly lethal, strong and stocky but blindingly fast when he wanted to be, a blur of wild motion. The Heartless couldn't keep up, and hell but they were really trying.
"You know," Roxas said, coming to rest at his back and breathing quickly, "I think we really got the better end of the deal. At least we can still think."
Axel chuckled ruefully. "Aww, you're popular. Enjoy it."
They were down to the stragglers now, but unfortunately for those stragglers, they'd made kind of a neat circle around them. Axel stretched out both arms, palms up, and with a flourish made his hands into fists. The air ignited in a wide ring of fire, and he let it burn until he could taste the dark wispy ash of tiny charred Heartless.
Roxas straightened slowly beside him, and said, "You show-off."
"Maybe a little." He brushed at his coat, and settled his hands on his hips, surveying the ballroom. Empty now. "Well. That was fun."
"Fun is one word for it."
That tone was -- Axel didn't really care for it. One of his chakrams had wound up halfway across the polished floor, thrown to catch a rare larger Heartless in the small of the back, and he flicked a wrist to retrieve it before responding. "What else would you call it?"
"A diversion, maybe." The other boy was frowning now, and he only released one of his keyblades back into the ether, keeping the other handy. "I don't know."
No, he didn't like any of this. "Well, either way. You're still hungry, right? So we should try another room. Maybe double-back and take one of the other staircases, because this really doesn't look like a kitchen to me."
Roxas nodded, but he didn't stop frowning, and when they found more Heartless waiting for them on the stairs, he actually sighed as he sliced through the first little one. "Axel?"
Admittedly, this group was even easier to take out than the one in the ballroom, but it still wasn't the best moment for conversation. "Yeah?" he said vaguely, setting a pair of the soldier-shaped ones on fire.
"Is this world falling into darkness? Because I don't remember there being Heartless every ten steps on normal worlds the last time I was out and about."
He didn't mean to, but the question made him stumble, and that left him wide open for a nasty blow that knocked him halfway down the stairs before he'd recovered enough to grab a banister. Roxas had already taken care of the remaining Heartless, and was now staring at him intently. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." A little bruised, mostly in the ego department, but fine. Axel pulled himself to his feet and then took another look at their surroundings, breathing in slowly, trying not to think stupidly, But it can't be, no one said anything about taking this world--
--because he already knew he was wrong. There it was, the subtle but unmistakable taste on his tongue.
"It's not strong," he said when he was sure. "Can't be too advanced. Why..." Why are you asking me, he started to say, but that was obvious, wasn't it? Axel snuck a glance at the smaller boy.
He was staring off into the distance, almost determinedly. "Yeah," he murmured. "I thought so. But I wanted to know."
And he'd suddenly realized he couldn't tell.
The silence that fell between them was distinctly unpleasant. Axel wet his lips, and then took a deep breath. "What's it feel like?" he asked softly. "Not to, I mean."
Roxas turned away from him, heading for the door at the top of the stairs, and for half a second he thought he wasn't going to get an answer. "It kind of -- feels like a weakness. Something I won't be able to defend myself against." He sounded irritated again, or frustrated maybe, and paused to shove the door open. "But I think a part of me--" Roxas cut himself off, and the line of his shoulders went rigid.
He was seriously having trouble breathing during these conversations. "Part of you... what?"
The door was open now. Roxas leaned against it, and now he could see the smaller boy's expression -- a slow, thoughtful scowl. "I guess, there's still a part of me that thinks the way..." He pursed his lips. "The way DiZ made it think. It's in my head. And that part of me is glad I can't. Glad I'm weak."
And he didn't want to say this, either, but now it felt necessary. "You think it's DiZ," Axel repeated, "and now Sora?"
"I don't think Sora was scared of the dark like this." The blond's tone turned slightly venomous, slightly sneering. "At least, I hope not. That would be pretty embarrassing."
Axel felt something like a smile touching the corners of his lips. He twisted it. "Tch. Scared? I don't know about that. But he didn't like it. Would've hated it, probably, if he hadn't been Sora."
"...DiZ talked about hate."
Another brief silence, just as nasty. Roxas had his arms folded over his chest now, brooding gaze on the floor or something past it, and Axel thought about apologizing but couldn't quite get his mouth around the words.
Well, fuck me, he thought.
Then the other boy looked up, and said, in a very different sort of voice, "You knew him, didn't you."
It took Axel a full minute to realize his slip. He rubbed the back of his neck, and finally shrugged. "'Knew' is kind of a strong word for it. Let's say -- we'd met."
The weight of that -- what it meant about everything he'd said a year ago -- settled between them. Roxas studied him, and he could almost feel the thought: You lied to me. And that's not really surprising, but this was important. Don't you have anything to say for yourself?
He didn't. But he had to try.
"Look at it this way," Axel began quietly, "everything I've done so far has been to keep you alive. For some reason? Not really at the top of anyone else's list right now."
Roxas jerked a little as though he'd been slapped. He wanted to know to know what the hell that was supposed to mean.
No, he still wasn't ready for this. He really never would've been. "I... don't think the new you is really what any of the higher-ups had in mind."
And saying it wasn't any easier than he had expected it to be. Roxas didn't immediately understand, and when he finally did -- when Axel told him about the orders he'd been given, orders that made it sound as though it was more important to kill him before he could merge with Sora than actually bring him home -- he looked so disappointed.
Still not surprised (if anything, Axel thought this revelation came as even less of a surprise than his lie), but disappointed. And tired all over again.
He didn't ask about what other things might have been done to keep him alive, so Axel didn't mention them. Besides, what would he have said -- how would he have explained his actions -- when even now, a year later, he still didn't really get it himself.
"Well," Roxas said finally, prying himself away from the door, "Xemnas likes dealing with things in his own time, when he's ready for them. He'll come to me when he's prepared. And in the meantime..." He rolled his wrist, and the black keyblade spun neatly. "I'll prepare for him."
Axel gazed at him, and felt the empty place in his chest where his heart should've been clench. If he closed his eyes, he knew he'd be back in Never Was again, the rain falling steadily, watching Roxas walk away from him and knowing, without a doubt...
"Yeah," he said, forcing a lazy smirk. "Sounds like a plan."
Going up against the Organization was suicide.
NEXT >>> Beast's Castle, First Visit (Part 3)